Give some good advice (30 mins)

Goals of activity:
For students to identify reasons that teenagers engage in sexual intercourse.
For students to recognise the qualities of a good relationship.
For students to test their thinking with real life dilemmas.
For students to discuss their ideas with peers.


Activity Guidelines:
Step 1:
Divide the students into groups of three or four and assign each group to study one of the stories in detail.
Step 2:
The students come up with some good advice for the couple. The students can use what they learnt in the info plus the following questions to guide them. The advice should clarify the situation and give action steps to be taken.
Below are three stories of couples who have a dilemma.

Questions to ask
1. Are both of the young people respecting the other's wishes?
2. Are they being true to themselves?
3. Are they communicating clearly with each other?
4. What alternatives can you suggest to kep both parties happy?
5. Is one or both of the couple mis-informed?
6. Are both of them thinking about their future plans and dreams?

Story 1, Grace and Kunle:
Grace and Kunle are 17 years old and have been dating for almost a year. They spend all their free time together and they think they have a special relationship. They are good friends. They are able to talk to one another and they trust each other.When they first started going out they thought about sexual intercourse but did not feel ready. Kunle respects women and Grace and would also like to wait until he is married before having sexual intercourse. Grace is feeling envious of her friends because they seem to be doing more than her sexually. She is worried that she is not pleasing Kunle. Kunle's friends don't understand why he doesn't do "it" as everyone else is doing it. All together this is putting a strain on Kunle and Grace's relationship: they have lately been arguing about many things.
What advice can you give them to help solve their troubles?

Story 2, Kahla and Fred:
Kahla lately receives letters from a boy named Fred. He is a few years older and he is handsome. In the letters he expresses his interest in her and writes sweet things. Kahla is flattered and feels proud that such a handsome boy shows interest in her. She discusses what to do with her friend Rose. Rose knows him and says he has lots of girlfriends. Kahla goes to meet Fred for the first time. They have a nice time together and Fred gives Kahla a lovely gift. Fred has two girlfriends and lately they have been demanding more and more gifts from him. He doesn't know what to do as he doesn't earn so much money. For their second date Fred invites Kahla to go to his Uncle's house, because he knows his Uncle is not home. He hopes Kahla will have sex with him.
What advice can you give them about their relationship?

Story 3, Eka and James
Eka is 17 years old she has a little baby boy. She became pregnant when she had unprotected sexual intercourse with her boyfriend. Her mother has been helping her with the baby and she is finishing her studies. Recently she is dating James, they get along very well and James plays with her son sometimes. Eka is committed to secondary abstinence as she doesn't want to take any more risks. Recently James has been pushing her to reconsider this decision, he says they will use condoms so what is the problem. Eka is doubtful, she doesn't want to but she doesn't want to lose James.
What advice can you give the couple?